Chale tengo un post grandoote grandote que escribir, pero la mayoria del material esta en ingles, y pues... me da hueva traducirlo, y no es que me ponga mala onda con la raza que no lee ingles pero... pues es que el calor, la atonia, la laxitud...


ahi va...

DE COMO LOS AFRICANOS HACEN FILA, POR PENDEJOS, NO POR NEGROS.

No me considero una persona racista, es verdad que odio a los negros por alborotados y violentos, a los pochos por desbaratar totalmente un lenguaje que algun dia fue hermoso y completo, aparte de fascinerosos ,marranos y llorones, no hablan bien el ingles ( porque no es su pais) y se les olvida el español ( porque jamas se dignan vistar aquello que tanto -segun ellos- añoran), odio a la mayoria de las mujeres, porque casi todas son unas zorras estupidas, odio a los hombres feos, por feos, a los guapos porque no me dan bola, a los inteligentes porque se creen mas inteligentes que yo, y a los pendejos por pensar con el pito.

Fuera de esta gente ( ahh se me olvidaba, no trago a los chinos tampoco) ajem, fuera de estos grupos insignificantes, soy una persona de paz y armonia que ama a su projimo como a si misma.

Y en eso me manda un mail un africano, diciendome que me dara unos cuantos millones de dolares si lo ayudo a sacar una lana de una cuenta de un muertito... No se si los africanos son MUY pendejos y creen que los mexicanos muertos de hambre somos MAS pendejos aun, o simplemente que tenemos un retrazo tecnologico tan cabron, que jamas hemos oido hablar de estos engatuzamientos descarados.
(esta es la parte que me da harta gueva traducir, asi que va en ingles, y que san babelfish les ampare):

***********************************************************
From : oduri kevin
Reply-To :
Sent : Tuesday, August 7, 2007 11:47 AM
Subject : I HAVE DECIDED TO CONTACT YOU

Inbox


DEAR PARTNER,

AM MR. KELVIN ODURI, A STAFF OF BICIA BANK OF BURKINA FASO. WITH DUE RESPECT AND REGARDS, I HAVE DECIDED TO CONTACT YOU ON A BUSINESS TRANSACTION THAT WILL BE VERY BENEFICIAL TO BOTH OF US AT THE END OF THE TRANSACTION.

DURING MY INVESTIGATION AND AUDITING IN MY DEPARTMENT, I CAME ACROSS A VERY HUGE SUM OF MONEY BELONGING TO A DECEASED PERSON, A FOREIGNER WHO DIED IN A PLANE CRASH WITH HIS INTIRE FAMILY.


THE FUND HAS BEEN IN HIS BANK ACCOUNT WITH BICIA BANK WITHOUT ANY CLAIM OF THE FUND IN OUR CUSTODY EITHER FROM HIS FAMILY OR RELATION BEFORE OUR DISCOVERY TO THIS DEVELOPMENT. THE AMOUNT INVOLVED IS USD$15.000,000 (FIFTEEN MILLION FIVE HUNDRED THOUSAND U.S DOLLARS.)


I COULD HAVE DONE THIS DEAL ALONE BUT BECAUSE OF MY POSITION IN THIS COUNTRY AS A CIVIL SERVANT, WE ARE NOT ALLOWED TO OPERATE A FOREIGN ACCOUNT AND WOULD EVENTUALLY RAISE AN EYE BROW ON MY SIDE DURING THE TIME OF TRANSFER BECAUSE I WORK IN THIS BANK. THIS IS THE ACTUAL REASON WHY IT WILL REQUIRE A SECOND PARTY OR FELLOW WHO WILL FORWARD CLAIMS AS THE NEXT OF KIN TO THE BANK AND ALSO PRESENT A FOREIGN ACCOUNT WHERE THE MONEY WILL BE TRANSFERRED TO.

YOU CAN SEE THE WEBSITE BELOW COVERING THE PLANE CRASH BY CNN & BBC NEWS.

http://www.cnn.com/2003/WORLD/africa/12/26/benin.crash

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/africa/3348109.stm


THIS DEAL IS 100% RISK FREE BUT YOU MUST KEEP THIS DEAL AS SECRET UNTIL THE FUND IS CONFIRMED IN YOUR ACCOUNT. ON SMOOTH CONCLUSION OF THIS TRANSACTION, YOU WILL BE ENTITLED TO 40% OF THE TOTAL SUM WHILE 60% WILL BE FOR ME. YOU HAVE BEEN ADVISED TO KEEP THIS TRANSACTION AS SECRET AS I AM STILL IN SERVICE AND INTEND TO RETIRE FROM SERVICE AFTER I CONCLUDE THIS DEAL WITH YOU.

I WILL BE MONITORING THE WHOLE SITUATION HERE IN THE BANK UNTIL YOU CONFIRM THE MONEY IN YOUR ACCOUNT AND ASK ME TO COME DOWN TO YOUR COUNTRY FOR SUBSEQUENT SHARING OF THE FUND ACCORDING TO PERCENTAGES INDICATED ABOVE.

ALL OTHER NECESSARY INFORMATION REGARDING THIS TRANSACTION WILL BE SENT TO YOU WHEN I HEAR FROM YOU. I SUGGEST YOU GET BACK TO ME AS SOON AS POSSIBLE STATING YOUR INTEREST IN THIS DEAL SO THAT I WILL SEND YOU THE TEXT OF THE APPLICATION TO FILL AND SEND TO THE BANK.

FINALLY, I WANT YOU TO INDICATE YOUR BANK ACCOUNT DETALS WHERE THE FUND WILL BE TRANSFERED TO LIKE:

1) NAME OF YOUR BANK................
2) ADDRESS OF YOUR BANK..............
3) ACCOUNT NUMBER............
4) YOUR PHONE NUMBER........
5) YOUR AGE ...................
6) YOUR OCCUPATION.............

I WILL BE GLAD TO HEAR FROM YOU AS SOON AS YOU RECEIVE THIS MESSAGE.

BEST REGARD,
MR. KELVIN ODURI,
BILL AND EXCHANGE MANAGER.
BICIA BANK OF BURKINA.

****************************************************************************

Como yo ya me la sabia, y no tenia ni madres que hacer, y me caen mal los pinches negros (y los chinos, y los pochos, y las viejas zorras, y los batos guapos, etc etc) decidi hacerlo ilusionarse un ratillo... y ahi va mi respuesta:

*****************************************************************************
From: conflictiva@hotmail.com
Subject: Let's do business
Date: Wed, 8 Aug 2007 22:32:32 +0000

Dear Mr Oduri:
What a tragedy... that these people would lose their lives in such an empty
way, I can assure you we are no strangers to tragedy ourselves as my father
has seen some of his very closest advisors and colegues pass away.
Let me introduce myself, I am Monique M. Hank, daughter of the
ilustrious owner of the town of Tijuana Mexico, Mr Jorge Hank Rohn. My
father is very much interested in going through with this business with you,
in case you do not know him, he is one of the richest most powerful men in
Mexico, owner of the caliente racetrack and betting foreign books in latin
america, and many fully operational casinos, as well as town marshal and
capitain of the Baja Mexico's fire brigade.
We are MOST INTERESTED in helping you aqcuire this healthy sum, AS LONG AS
THIS IS NOT A SCAM. Please be advised my father is a very powerfull person,
and does not take scams lightly, so I suggest that if you are on the level,
you reply immediatly, and if not, please desist from contacting us ever
again, lest my father take more, how shall I put it... drastic methods until
you desist from these games.

Our best to you and your family
Best regards
Monique M. Rohn.
********************************************************************************

El negrillo en cuestion, bien engranado me respondio con no uno sino dos correos:

*********************************************************************************

Dear Monique Hank,

I received your mail and thank you so much for your willingness in this great opportunity. I want to assure you and your family that this transaction is real and we make you all to be happy at the end of it.

I want your father to fill the below application and send it to the bank e-mail address and call me on my private phone number 00226 76450869 so that I will monitor it in the bank.

.....................................................................................................................

Attn: Mr. Christopher Harrison.
Foreign Remittance Director
Bicia Bank Of Burkina,
No: 479, Avenue N'Kwame N'Krumah BP 8 Ouagadougou 01,
ouagadougou,Burkina Faso.
Tel/Fax. (226) 50 42 01 79.
Ref Code: 800 B-BF OUAGA 2000 B 124.
Email: info_bicia_bf@excite.com or biciabankbf@aol.fr

Attention Sir,

APPLICATION FOR THE RELEASE AND SEBSEQUENT TRANSFER OF MY NHERITANCE FUNDS OF $15000.000 FROM ACCOUNT NUMBER 10463464701.

I am the cusin and next of kin to late Mr. Alimadu Korov, Your client who held above account number and who died in Benin plane crash in 2003. I discovered the above account details in my late cusin's bedroom in Labanon and as his next of kin, I humbly appeal to your honoured office to release and transfer this money into my receiving bank account below.

1) Your Bank Name: ..............
2) Your Bank Address: ....
3)Your Account Number......
4)Your Phone..................
5)Your fax....................................
6) Your Receiving Country: .............Mexico
7) Your E-Mail........conflictiva@hotmail.com
8) Your Age....................
9)Your profession.....................
10) Your Position in office.............
11)Your home address.........

I shall appreciate your prompt attention to this my application as I promise to abide by all your transaction rules and regulations.

Yours sincerely
Mr. Jorge Hank Rohn

**********************************************************************************

si Chucha, como no, ahorita en chinga te mando los datros del patron de TJ , esperame tantito, ah, falta el otro mail:

**********************************************************************************

Dear Monique Hank,

Thanks for your mail and I want you to read this message carefully for more understanding. However , this transaction is for our both benefit and as such, I want you to be sincere with me and never betray me when the fund is transferred into your bank account.

I want you to follow up with me despite the facts that We have not met yet but be rest assure that as soon as the fund is confirmed in your bank account, I will come over to meet you in your country for an invest with my share under your care and control.

Be inform that, I got your contact from Burkina Faso chambers of commerce and I strongly believe that any information receive from the above mentioned office is correct and must to be trusted. Can I trust you ? I hope that you will not betray me when the fund is transfered into your bank account ? I hope I will not regret transferring the fund into your account
The data information of this transaction is given for your understanding of the detail account of the Fund deposited by MR. ALIMADU KOROV before he died in Benin plane crash with his entire family in the year 2003 .

You can still see again the website covering the death as posted by the CNN and BBC news report;

You can still see again the website covering the death:
http://www.cnn.com/2003/WORLD/africa/12/26/benin.crash
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/africa/3348109.stm

" ACCOUNT INFORMATION"

NAMEOF THE DEPOSITOR.....................MR.ALIMADU KOROV. AGE: 68 YEARS.
NAME OF HIS WIFE........................MRS. GLORIA KOROV AGE: 66 YEARS.
AMOUNT DEPOSITED..................... U.S $15 MILLION
NATIONALITY.........................................LABANON
TYPE OF ACCOUNT OPERATED...........CURRENT ACCOUNT
MARITAL STATUS...................................MARRIED WITH CHILDREN.
NAMES OF HIS CHILDREN ......... MR. JEANY KOROV AGE: 20 YRS. MISS. CRISTY KOROV AGE: 18 YEARS AND MISS. CHICHIE KOROV AGE: 15 YEARS.
RELIGION...................................................CHRISTAINITY
BUSINESS IN AFRICA..............BUYING AND SELLING OF GOLD AND DIAMOND.

There is no doubt about your eligibility as the legal next of kin to our deceased customer because before the death of our deceased customer,his true next of kin was his wife but unfortunately, the wife died along side with him leaving nobody for the claim.

Based on that, the Board of directors and the management of this reputable bank authorised me officially as the executive manager,BILL AND EXCHANGE of the bank to verify the next of kin to our deceased customer.Therefore, the bank will always abide by my official directions through the official authorisation bestowed on me. So, I will present you as the next of kin but you must not let the bank know that I am giving you information about the deceased customer until the fund is confirm in your bank account.

Don't forget that I am here to back you up and the only way to proceed further now is that you should send your banking details along with your informations to the bank e-mail address as to enable me monitor the transaction. I am here for your interest and as such, you should not be afriad in this transaction.

Note: You must keep this transaction as top secret until the fund is confirmed in you bank account if you want us to execute this deal. You should not let anybody notice this transaction until the fund get into your account. Please, keeping the Secret of this transaction is very important in this deal and you will be happy at the end of this transaction.
I want you to have it at the bank of your mind that all our expenses in this transaction will be deducted as soon as the fund is transfrred into your bank account. So, you should record down all your internet bill, telephone calls, sending of fax to the bank (if any) ETC because we will deduct it all before we share the fund according to our percentage.

Furthermore, the next of kin can be a brother, sister, mother, uncle, cusin, naphew, wife, son or even far relation from different continet in the world. You should also understand that, Bank is not interested to know if you are bearing the same surname with the deceased or not. The Bank is interested to know if the account details of the deceased and the amount mentioned above is in the account which I know that the information provided is correct and must convince the bank directors that you are the next of kin and immediately the fund will be transfer of the fund into your bank account.

Finally, You are advised to call me immediately through this my private phone number 00226 76450869 for confirmation of the receipt of this application form.

I am waiting to hear from you as soon as you send it to the bank.
Yours brother
Mr.Kevin Oduri
Bill and Exchange Manager.
Bicia Bank Plc.


***********************************************************************************

Pos ya estaba muy creido el jodido negro cuando le respondo:

************************************************************************************

Dear Mr Oduri:
Thank you for your prompt response.
My father has given me green light to go ahead and make all preparations for
this transactions.
As you may imagine,my father has many investments that he keeps under the
names of his esquires for tax saving purposes. And the transactions between
you two will not be an exception.

He has already contacted some people who owe him a couple of favors and
arranged to have legal passports bearing the last name KOROV to be made for
two of his esquires, who will accompany him , as well as his secretaries and
bodygards to your nation by the end of August. Please, I suggest you make
all necessary arrangements to proceed as fast as possible.

Also I want to tell you in advanced, you need not worry about deducting
expenses, my father will provide for all expenses you may encounter, in
appretiation for your choosing us to participate in this most profitable
arrangement.

My secretary will contact you in a few days, we need to have a contact to
arrange with a suitable hotel suite for a party of 12 people, as well as
arrange the rent of a couple of limousines.
My father has a private zoo in our home, so he may as well be interested in
purchasing some exotic animals for his collection. If you could arrange for
a guide, this will be most appreciated.

Well Mr odurik, I so look forward to us meeting in person,
My best regards to you

Monique.
**********************************************************************************

JAJAJ se le han de haber caido los calzones ( si es que usan) al pinche negro, y muy desesperado escribio:

***********************************************************************************

Dear Monica,

I received your mail and I thank you so much for your nice mail. I want you to feel the application and send it to the bank as I directed you.

As you know, I am not rich and I can not afford to arrange for hummer jeep and arrange for Three STAR Hotel. You should fill the application and send it to the bank.
Kindly, send the application to the bank and any time you are ready to come down here, try to notify me but I can not afford the expenses to receive five persons here.

Thank you
Mr.Oduri Kevin.

**********************************************************************************

Pobre negro pendejo de seguro veia como los billetitos se iban flotando como pajaritos en el cielo, ya nomas le conteste:

************************************************************************

> From: conflictiva@hotmail.com
> To: odurikelvin@yahoo.com
> Subject: RE: VERY URGENT
> Date: Fri, 10 Aug 2007 22:21:56 +0000
>
Dear Oduri:

I think we have a HUGE missunderstanding here.. We do not wish YOU to pay
for anything, just to make proper reservations. In a few days my secretary
will contact you to attain phone number of hotels, limo services, tour
guides and etc. My father insists of taking the trip to your country and
veryfing the lawyers do everything correctly. We are most pleased with these
transaction, but it must be done in person, this is my father's way of doing
straight business, so please just get phone numbers of limosine services,
hotels and etc.

I hope I have cleared up this matter , we would not dream on imposing on
such a kind gentleman like yourself , on the contrary, my father has
insinuated that maybe after all transactions are finished we can go to his
summer house in Monaco , it is such a nice place.

Best regards

Monique Hank Rohn

*****************************************************************************


Y el pendejo ya no me contesto mas.
Porque son asi los pinches negros? por eso nadie los quiere, por alborotadores, porque son puro tilin tilin y nada de paletas.

Alguien tiene un mail de cadenita que quiera compartirme? estoy muy aburrida...sniff.